Podcast: EP 55 Love, Forgiveness, and Healing from Abuse with Shaman Durek

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Wellness visionary & inspirational speaker, author of Let Your Fears Make You Fierce, & Founder of The Get Loved Up Community. My core mission is to promote daily self-care, oneness & eco-friendly living.

Hi, I'm Koya

Abuse exists in many forms — emotional, physical, sexual, psychological, cultural, or financial. To hear about someone going through it brings great distress to the listener, but to imagine the victim’s state is almost impossible.

Whether the abuse occurred in childhood or adulthood, walking out of it takes great willpower that rests within all of us. No one loves falling flat on their face, but rising back up is essential. It’s not easy to forgive, but when you learn to forgive, you open yourself to love, a trusting spirit, and a life of wellbeing. 

I have a fantastic guest for today’s episode — Shaman Durek. Shaman Durek is an incredible man with an exciting journey, which you’ll hear all about today. His experience with abuse and his eventual rise from it is inspiring, and his journey has been that of wellness through spiritual healing. 

Shaman Durek inspires millions worldwide to tap into their personal power and unblock the negative patterns that keep them from reaching optimal human performance. I am so excited for you all to be a part of today’s episode of the Get Loved Up podcast and hope that you learn from Shaman Durek’s experiences. 

Without further ado, let’s get started. 

Who Is Shaman Durek?

Shaman Durek is a sixth-generation shaman whose teachings have impacted thousands of people, from diverse public figures such as Nina Dobrev and Gwyneth Paltrow, to tech giants such as Dave Asprey of Bulletproof Coffee

Known as the first “spirit shaman” to be featured in People Magazine, Shaman Durek’s work has been recognized globally by major mainstream publications like Elle, Marie Claire, Los Angeles Times, and The New York Times.

In his best-selling book, Spirit Hacking: Shamanic Keys to Reclaim Your Personal Power, Transform Yourself, and Light up the World, Shaman Durek talks about humanity’s evolution and simplifying our lives through common sense. He is redefining what wellness means by putting the power back into people’s hands so that they consciously live their lives authentically and in alignment. With his powerful ancient teaching, he helps demystify spirituality and make it attainable and understandable for the mainstream audience.

It’s not easy to become a shaman, and Shaman Durek has been through a lot on his journey of becoming one. If anything, his challenging path to shamanism shaped him to be a better human. He has extracted the best from all the philosophies, theories, spiritual teachings, and religions in the world.

“If you only believe in … and do what humans say, then you can’t be a shaman because [this means] that you can be easily programmed. … This world is temporal, and the spirit world is eternal, so my devotion is to the spirit world and not the temporal world.” – Shaman Durek

For Shaman Durek, both his father and mother’s side were trained in shamanism, and he was exposed to it at quite a young age. However, growing up was quite traumatic for him because his parents divorced when he was three. This is also around the same time when his grandparents got his father’s side of the family shifted over to Catholicism. With a lot happening around him, Shaman Durek was also a victim of abuse, but he rose from it like a phoenix rising out of the ashes.

A Young Shaman with an Abusive Childhood

Shaman Durek found himself on contradicting sides of religion and spiritual healing — on more than one occasion. He could always feel his powers, but he had to chart his own path to discovery and acknowledgment due to his multi-cultural background. 

“[My mom’s side] was always clear that being with God is a relationship, a relationship with the trees, flowers, moon, sun, food, your body, mind, etc. And the stronger your relationship, and the more respect, humbleness, and humility you have in that relationship, the stronger your powers will be, and the more you will be of service to humanity. … [Whereas on my father’s side] it was [more] about doing what you are told to do. … [I always had] questions about God’s [intention], … but there was never really an answer, [just a bunch of rules].” – Shaman Durek

Shaman Durek always felt his path was to lead others out of oppression through a mindset of healing by forgiveness. He himself fell victim to physical abuse by his own father and stepmother and was also molested by his male babysitter multiple times. Shaman Durek couldn’t understand why his father was not protecting him, and he started seeing humanity underlined with the same patterns of lies and contradictions. 

“Everybody can see the truth, [but in school I realized] that my friends were programmed. They were told they were not allowed to speak their truth or they were going to get in trouble. … A fear is initiated from the moment you arrive on Earth, [about what you can and] cannot do. … And that was always my dilemma in my shamanic training as a child, this walk in-between the lies and the deceit … [to reach] humanity and my own inner feelings.” – Shaman Durek

My heart goes out to Shaman Durek for enduring that amount of abuse, and it is so powerful that even after that exploitation, he went on to be an enormous blessing to the world. People are abused all around the globe, and they feel that it’s the end and that they are destined to be a victim forever. But here is proof that you can not only get out, but you can also own your life and turn it into something that can be a ray of hope for so many others.

Finding Forgiveness to Break the Cycle of Abuse and Embracing Love

Whenever Shaman Durek tried to forgive his father, stepmother, or babysitter, he couldn’t get closure. The suffering and the need to acknowledge that pain was still there. But his ability to see things allowed him to look past his suffering, accept his situation, and move on to a place of higher existence.

“After I went through a lot of physical abuse, I became an alcoholic, [and a drug] addict … to stop and deny the pain that I was still feeling. [This was] while I was still training in shamanism and understanding the holistic arts. … The hurt was not from my step-mom, my dad, or [that babysitter], … it was through another energy that was perpetuating through them. … So when I realized that every pain they inflicted upon me … was because they were in pain. And they were telling their story so that they can feel justified for the fact that they went through what they went through. And in order for me not to be like them … I needed to get to a place of acceptance. … And it was the acceptance that allowed me to truly forgive them.” – Shaman Durek

Shaman Durek found refuge by burying himself with love, and that’s how he was able to move on from that place of being a victim. While some people choose to become angry when someone inflicts them with pain, Shaman Durek’s wisdom and unique approach allowed him to rise above his pain. Beyond acceptance lies compassion, and with compassion comes the power to understand people’s nature and to change their world with love and guidance. 

“When people talk about being in abusive situations, [most] are choosing to be in it is because somewhere inside they [think of themselves] as victims. [And] the worst things that humans do is to lie to themselves by accepting [baseless] things as truth. … The awareness of spirit is held within the fact that you are an eternal being and that you can change yourself any day, any moment, … and that you are not held in one form. … That’s why I say — [spread love all around you].” – Shaman Derek

Love is unconditional, and it is about compassion, acceptance, and awareness, and a lot of times, we undermine its true potential. Love is the medicine that can heal you from your trauma, even when you are not conscious about it. Every small thing that irritates and drives you crazy is a part of the healing process. Learning to get comfortable in one’s skin and speaking up for yourself and others for the truth are traits that come along this path. 

The Power of Spirit and the Beauty of Love

We put our faith behind people and empower them to run the world. Similarly, when it comes to the government, we vote for our leaders while knowing that their decisions will affect things around us. But who has the real power? The people that put them there, or the leaders themselves?

“We humans feel that these leaders have power, but they only have power because the collective is disenfranchised. … If you can keep people distracted on superficial things and [keep them] disconnected from the reality of who they are, then you can rule over them, and control them, … and that’s not freedom. Freedom is liberation, and liberation is knowing that no one has power over you. When you have a dream and an understanding, you are not [following] it for other people to believe in you; you are holding the dream so that the spirit can move through you.” – Shaman Durek

We have to give back and learn to self-love and live in balance with Mother Earth. It seems easy to divert all your power towards the many distractions, but the spirit is all-powerful, and eventually, you will have to experience your own reality. Being in touch with your spirit is vital to unlocking the answers that you seek from the Universe. And I love how Shaman Durek makes it fun and keeps it real because spirituality doesn’t have to be so hard. This also helps him in forming connections and maintaining relationships with fellow humans while having space for himself.

“From all aspects of life, autonomy and being in the nucleus of your own being is so necessary, for you to be able to hold space for another person. … If codependency is in there, … then it will become a power struggle. That struggle is not with the other person, but with your own self. It’s the same as spirituality. No one completes me, … [I don’t have] to be codependent and act as if something or someone else is completing me. The only thing that completes me is my relationship with God.” – Shaman Durek

In terms of codependency, if you love a person for who they are and what they have to say, without judgments and the need to force your perspective down their throat, then your love is unconditional.

“Love to me is acceptance; it’s [being comfortable] with people being as they choose to be, without you needing to change or rearrange or improve them. I love [every soul] because God created you [and everything else in nature].” – Shaman Durek

And that’s a perfect way to seal off this episode with love. And everything is possible with unconditional love; it is the one true medicine for every ailment.

Get Loved Up with Shaman Durek

This interview with Shaman Durek was profound in so many ways. The life and experiences of Shaman Durek and his approach to those experiences are what allowed him to find peace and contentment. And there is so much to learn from our interaction today. Unfortunately, I couldn’t fit in the entire interview with Shaman Durek in this post, so to find out what you missed, check the full episode here.

To find out more about Shaman Durek and his shamanic life, check out his website. And to see how he lives each day with a purpose, you can follow him on Instagram and Youtube

I feel blessed to have been able to peek inside Shaman Durek’s life today and find so much strength and wisdom from it. If you liked this episode of the Get Loved Up podcast, then do tag Shaman Durek, @shamandurek, and me, @koyawebb, on Instagram with a screenshot of your greatest takeaways from this episode.

Love, you have all the power to transform your life and also help those around you. Stop looking for spirituality outside because it is all within you. For more guidance, check out my book Let Your Fears Make You Fierce. You’ll find the tools you need to turn your pain into power, heal your body and open your spiritual mind, and manifest success.  

I love you all. 

Koya Web Signature

  • Shaman Durek describes his trials in his upbringing and his spiritual influences (3:10)
  • Why love and authenticity are so important to the shaman’s journey (10:18)
  • How to find forgiveness through wanting to break the cycle of abuse (14:21)
  • Why understanding abuse as an illness will set you free of it (23:20)
  • Why taking care of our species and all nature is so important to our survival (27:31)
  • How separation can be healing (29:51)
  • How perception plays into how we discuss things (34:42)
  • How entertainment and self interest can distract us from what’s most important (43:12)
  • How owning your own space will help you hold space for others (55:09)
  • What love means to Shaman Durek (1:02:41)

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